3 Actions to Bring Back in ‘22

I recently caught myself on the phone, trying to send an email while paying for a snack at the gas station, all at the same time. After getting flustered and physically unable to function with only 2 hands and 4 tasks, I stopped what I was doing, apologized to the woman behind the plastic partition for attempting to multitask terribly. She looked at me and smiled (with her eyes due to the mask) and said, "I appreciate that, but you don't need to apologize. You're just having a rushed morning. You're doing amazing, and you're going to have a great day." 

Let's face it, between technology, masks, and a pandemic, social etiquette, on the whole, has taken a back seat to social distancing.

I spent the next 20 minutes thinking about this exchange and how good it felt to genuinely connect with someone, albeit a stranger, despite our physical barriers. Since then, I challenged myself to intentionally focus on doing these three socially distant yet socially welcoming things in public. 

1. Eye contact

   As simple as this sounds, it may be pretty tricky for some. My son, for example, does not particularly like eye contact in certain situations. However, if you're in a place where you're comfortable and feel safe, take 5 seconds and make eye contact. Especially in a service situation where people are working hard yet often ignored and taking the brunt of others' frustrations.

2. Waving

   I never thought I would say this (I typically do not like people touching me), but man, I miss hugs. For humans to go days or weeks without any welcomed physical touch is unhealthy. It adds a whole new isolation level to a pretty lonely space we are forced to be in. Enter: WAVING! Rock that wave to anyone and everyone Forrest Gump style (add eye contact for an extra boost) and watch how a simple gesture can positively impact someone's day. Being waved at is a sign of being seen-both physically and perhaps metaphorically.

3. Compliments

   For as long as I can remember, my daughter could not go anywhere without randomly complimenting someone on something. Initially, it was cute, sometimes annoying (because I was often in a rush and said compliments slowed me down), and then it just became part of her norm. However, I have started to see (because I'm making eye contact) how much these arbitrary remarks to strangers on everything from what they're wearing to what they're doing mean to people. The truth is, everyone likes a genuine compliment. It feels good to hear something kind and positive, especially unexpectedly.

One wouldn't think these 3 simple things would mean anything or make much of a positive impact, but they do.

All three require little effort and result in the recipients (and often the givers) releasing the feel-good hormone oxytocin. These hormones play an essential part in reducing stress and anxiety. It has a substantial calming effect that can influence emotional and mental health, impacting our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors (the world needs more oxytocin). 

Challenge yourself this week and practice one of these mood boosters (or hey, go wild and practice all 3). See if the intentional practice of social connection brings a bit of joy to your day.